Daily Life

February 12, 2008

Finally, I am at home now. Actually I was at home long time ago. I was just too lazy to right anything. Right now, I don’t want to think anything, anything about my future and so on. One thing that I am sure is that I won’t be as free as before. Being 20something means a lot to me in my whole life. Though I might complain that I don’t have so much as before to enjoy my life(or be lazy, put it in another way), all of those efforts that I have made right now will paved my way in the coming year. Right now I am not sure whether I will go to German for my postgraduate as I have planned before. Maybe I will really fall in love with this job, which I don’t know yet. However, I do know that I won’t give up learning German. I promised myself that I want to speak a very good German before I am 25 years old. In my city way of calculating age, I am already 23 years old this year, which means that I still have got another two years.   

My mind is pretty blank and empty right now. It seems that there isn’t so much hope for me to pass TEM-8, which is supposed to be held in March 9^th. Anyway, there is still like one and half month left for me. I really don’t know what kind of miracle that I can make in this time. But I think if there is time, there is still hope. Miracle can happen anytime as long as you won’t give up yourself. That is it.

Well, I really don’t know where to start my daily this moment. Firstly, I would like to say that I love learning language. I don’t know since when I began to acquire this habit. I guess my friends have big influence on me. Actually, it is not they intend to make me like something; it is just because I think it is time for me to do something good for myself. So after someone left to his country, I began to fell in love with reading. I had read lots of books after that person left. I don’t know why I think I “should” make myself a talent and wisdom woman (a lady, maybe). Later I realized that I got so much fun from reading, and then I was addicted to reading. Even right now I am still very grateful and appreciated for that person. I think he made me find those what so-called interests. I have never seen someone who is so serious when he or she is working. Then I told myself that I need to work very hard which is for the sake of myself. I want to be a smart girl. I am eager to learn more things. I began to challenge new things. I began to change my attitude toward something. The last half year of 2007 I had learnt a lot in my life.

People walk into your life. Some of them walk away later, taking something from you---your love, your careness.  Some of them make you hate them when they leave you, even if you together had good memories before. Then he told you,” Well it is time for us to say goodbye” You don’t know why because they think you have done nothing wrong. There is a time you are desperate and disappointed with this world. Later, you walk out of this dark and gray shadow. You begin to meet new friends but still you put your whole heart into this relationship. Then maybe same thing happen to you again. Well, I name this period as “Growing-up Pain”.

Everything will be fine. There is on wall that we can’t jump over and there is no sadness that we can’t conquer. It is just about if you want to face them. The earth still keeps on turning around and the sun still rise up when you are in bad mood or unhappy or desperate.

We have to fail many times before we know how to deal with something. Unfortunately, during the failing period we may lose some friends as we don’t know how to handle those relationships. My parents don’t teach me how. So I need to practice again and again before I know how.

Still, I want to be serious with every friendship that I think worth carrying on. I want to be true with them.

Okay, this moment again.

I have just finished my today’s tasks.

Hey, guys, I am busy right now. There was a time I told myself that I would stop studying hard as soon as I have finished this big exam my life university life. However, I realize that I have to get used to be busy as I am at my golden age right now. It is a period that I am supposed to work hard to make foundation for my later success in my life. I am young and energetic. What is more, I have plenty of time that I can “waste” right now. I don’t want to regret to say “It is too late. And I am too old for that” when I am like 30s. Learning is an endless road. I know that. But, I just want to learn as much as possible before I graduate. Right now I even don’t care much about my appearance. Girls like my age are supposed to spend tons of time on make-up, buying clothes, cosmetics and so on. Even my mom is very surprised that why I don’t even care about those things. So does some of my good friends. Every time when they ask me this question, I would say” Well, I was studying very hard”.

I guess after May 9^th, I will begin my real holiday. For me, a holiday means that a time when I can do what I like. So in next semester, I will get about 4 month free, as I won’t do any internship or have classes. I think I am not in a hurry to find a job, as I don’t have to feed on my family. (^_^)

Actually, I am thinking of planning a trip, a trip to abroad. I want to consider that trip as a reward if I pass TEM-8. Even if I don’t have time then I can go whenever I have time. At least, I have a good reason to go. The reason why I want to have a reason is that I don’t want to feel guilty when I spend my parents’ money for that trip. ^_^

I guess, someone is going to punch me. Okay~

Maybe, I can invest some money for my French course. It also can be considered as a reward.

In a word, I just want to find some reasons to spend money.

We will see la~

Good night~ Trudy~ ^_^